Editors note:  Please check out the Post-interview Kickstarter Campaign to raise money  for the release of Christeene’s first  full album –  We are almost at the goal  – Please Give what you can or share this article  with your friends to help raise the money needed. – Thanks ! Brian Mills 

Christeene has performed all over the world and her videos spread quickly and virally across the web yet are banned from You Tube.  The seeds she has planted  take over the world have only begun to sprout ass the twisted hearts and minds of her followers ( like us )  continue to lift words pf praise unto   her . She is the creator of such songs as “Fix My Dick” , Working on Grandma” and her latest song and  video shot in public malls and scientology churches ” African Mayonnaise”  will surely lure you into her cult . Christeene plans on releaseing an album later  this year ; more information can be found at the end of this twisted interview .  Godspeed my friends.

Interview By Brian MIlls

Fierth:                        What is your name?

           Christeene

Fierth:                        What is your motto?

Christeene:      Play tooo win dat nay nay

Fierth:                        How do you describe your work?

Christeene:      CHRISTEENE has been characterized as being a sexually infused sewer of live rap and vile shamelessness, capable of adapting amazingly well to all styles of music.

Fierth:                        What accomplishment are you most proud of ?

Christeene:      I ate a steak wit RICK OWENS in Paris one nite

Fierth:                        What is the secret to success ?

Christeene:      My boots

Fierth:                        What about your work frustrates you ?

Christeene:      Singin in a microphone at JJ Booya’s house dat has a pantyhose taped to it

Fierth:                        What do you like most about what you do?

Christeene:      I meat reeelly niyeece people who git it an want more

Fierth:                        How tall are you?

Christeene:      Tall enuff to pee standin up

Fierth:                     How do you keep it real?

Christeene:      Bein me

Fierth:                     Describe a time/event in your life that you’re nostalgic for.

Christeene:      Makin da first video Fix My Dick wit PJ Raval an my boyz T Gravel an C Baby

Fierth:                        Where are you based , where do you call home ?

Christeene:      Austin Texas muthafuggggas

Fierth:                       Describe your home in 6 words or less.

Christeene:      Dry cozy brown

Fierth:                     How would your best friend describe you?

Christeene:      pretty

Fierth:                        What are some qualities you value in your friends ?

Christeene:      I trust my friendz

Fierth:                        If someone wrote a biography on your life , what do you think the title should be?

Christeene:      Baybeee dawwwl

Fierth:                        If you could learn to do anything, what would it be?

Christeene:      Clean my toilet hole

Fierth:                        Have you ever felt hopeless? How did you get through it?

Christeene:      bananas

Fierth:                        What makes you angry ?

Christeene:      azzzzzholes

Fierth:                        What brings you the most joy?

Christeene:      My boyz an da people who like da sheet we makin ferr da real reasons

Fierth:                        What motivates you in life?

Christeene:      My boyz

Fierth:                        If you weren’t doing what you are doing now, what do you think you would be doing?

Christeene:      Huh?

Fierth:                        Do you collect anything? If so, what?

Christeene:      puppies

Fierth:                        Do you have any obsessions right now?

Christeene:      dick

Fierth:                        If you could buy anything regardless of cost, what would you buy?

Christeene:      puppies

Fierth:                        Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed?

Christeene:      da Oprah angelz

Fierth:                        The kids today …

Christeene:      Doinn kooool sheeeeeet

Fierth:                        What is your beauty secret ?

Christeene:      Not havin one

Fierth:                        What is your favorite sound?

Christeene:      Children sangin

Fierth:                        What is your “ Safety Word”?

Christeene:      Huh?

Fierth:                        Do you know how to cook? What do you most like to make ?

Christeene:      Puddin cakes

Fierth:                        Who do you have your eye on right now ? ( up and coming talents )

Christeene:      Aerea Negrot

Fierth:                        What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?

Christeene:      Diz bear in San Fran gave me a lil matchbook he had decorated when we performed at FOLSOM ST FAIR and it had glitter on it an a picture uh a lil bear in a hardhat an I still got it an keep it by my mattress.

Fierth:                        Which places have you traveled to that you feel had changed your perspective of the world ?

Christeene:      Berlin an Stockholm an paris…..an C Baby’s backyard.

Fierth:                        What’s something about yourself that no one knows?

Christeene:      Sumtin dat no one knowz……

Fierth:                        Lets play a round of woerkd association quick fire , I am going to say a word , tell me the first thing that comes to your mind.

Christeene:

Bitch: Nancy grace

Money: Honey

Love: Is goooood

Unique: Phonique

Power: Will eat u up

Hate: Aint good

Moist: As a dawg

Sex: Aint wurth it

Dirt: Smellz good

God: Who?

Cozy: Puppies

Fame: I wanna live ferrrever

Funny: Lady

Best: Is worst

Good : Food

Bad: Huh

Worst: Turd

ME:  Who?

Fierth:                        Leave us a quote to carry on with :

Christeene:      U never know whooo gunna put eggz in dat chicken basket, so be good to dem chickenz yallz.

Fierth:                        How can we find out more about you :

Christeene:

Face book: Facebook.com/christeene

Webpage: Christeene.org

Twitter: Twitter.com/fixmydick

Email : [email protected]

K I C K S T A R T E R   C A M P A I G N

CHRISTEENE : The launch and release of the First Album.

ABOUT THIS PROJECT

A year and a half ago we came to you on our bruised knees…asking for your courage and your strength to endure the shameful task of supporting CHRISTEENE in making two new videos : “Bustin’ Brown” and “African Mayonnaise“.  It worked. It worked so much so that an additional video, “Workin’ on Grandma“, was also produced. Because of you, this was all possible. The world rejoiced, the world cried, and the world became very hungry for more. 

With all our stank heart and soul we are returning to your fields of green, this time standing on our own dirty feet, making a call to arms to all of you around the world who have been ‘touched’ by the creature that is CHRISTEENE.

It pleases us to no end to announce that the First Full Album is primed for its tight production and hard release into the world. Appropriately titled ‘WASTE UP, KNEEZ DOWN’ this self produced album chronicles CHRISTEENE’s tumultuous life throughout the past 3 years, delving deep into the back rooms, bright lights, and burnt offerings of this talented nightmare.

Our mission now is to complete the album and release it to the world in April of 2012. This is where you, oh faithful followers, come in. With your contributions and your networking of this main event, CHRISTEENE and the Gang will be able to cover all costs needed to record, mix, master, design, produce, package and deliver WASTE UP, KNEEZ DOWN in the best and most deserved way possible to you and yours. Your contributions will also go towards funding the strongest foundation necessary to premiere the debut album here in Austin, Texas, and launch the CHRISTEENE machine into the world through self manufactured touring, merchandising and public relations. From day one we have DIY’ed ourselves with pride in the production of this collection of work. We aim to carry on in that spirit while finally being able to reward the work with much needed funding for the future.

CHRISTEENE has reached a very diverse audience and has caused much conversation to take place concerning gender roles, race, sexuality, celebrity, religion, morality and the movement of music through a new and dangerous conductor of energy and escapism. Our goal is to continue to challenge, entertain and force feed our growing audience with all we have to give.

Do stank dreams really come true? Indeed they do…with your help and generosity. We love you all, we salute your courage and shamelessness, and we look forward to seeing you sweat to the raw and infectious new sounds of CHRISTEENE.

Forever Yours,

CHRISTEENE, C-BABY, T-GRAVEL, JJ BOOYA, PJ RAVAL.

(Special thx OTIS IKE/photo, Drew Xanthopoulos/video, Ivete Lucas/editing)